A Diverse Table
We've people with autism, PTSD, dyscalculia, ADHD, DID, and many other issues that they need to deal with. We've had players like this for most of our life; enough so that we've picked up a number of skills to help keep the games going. Not always, not always well, but we've got a lot more successes than failures under our belt.
Running tables for those with special needs is a bit more work than normal, but we also feel it's a lot more rewarding -- gaming should be for everyone, and we make it a point to try to keep our tables open for everyone, including those players who would be seen as 'problem players' because people don't know how to deal with, say, an autistic player.
Don't Lie
The unfortunate thing is some players on the autism spectrum just don't take lying well -- like us, for instance. It causes stress, frustration, and anger if we feel we've been lied to -- even if the lie would be a 'white lie'. We can tell the difference between a lie done 'in character', and one that's done 'out of character' - but depending on the nature of the lie it can trigger an emotional reaction.
This is one reason why we ask new game masters (those who are going to GM us for the first time) whether or not they fudge dice rolls or use quantum ogres ('the illusion of choice'). We react to such things as cheating / lying, which means we do not take it well. If the GM says 'yes', we thank them and go find a new table.. If the GM says 'no', cool, we're interested in playing. And pray to god the GM wasn't lying, because if we find out, things go south immediately, because not only did we catch them lying (fudging or whatever), this also means they've been effectively lying non-stop since the start. We have to leave the game right then and there. It's one reason why we don't fudge when we GM, or use quantum ogres. It's lying to the players - and if we've an autistic player who's triggered by lying?
Time Out for Mechanics
Our partner has ADHD, math anxiety, and dyscalculia, which means dice rolls, adding numbers together, and figuring out charts and mechanics can be quite difficult. This means we need to be willing to pause the game long enough to figure out what numbers are needed, and what totals are generated. It also means we need to set time aside from time to time to help level characters or help spend XP, because we know our partner won't be doing it without help. Often, it's simpler to do the work, then point it out and see if there's anything they would want to do differently. Since we know our partner so well, it's usually an easy procedure, but it's something that has to be done on top of our own prepwork.
We've also had players who simply can't handle mechanics because of a lack of education. A player on the autism spectrum, who had to leave school at Grade 2, for instance. They enjoy roleplaying, but there is so much they simply don't know -- even in their 20s. This means telling them how to do the things they want to do -- what skills or abilities come into play, what dice to roll, and so forth.
For an Exalted campaign, we made a series of flowcharts for some players, so they would know how to use their combos, including the costs, the timing, and what triggers when.
Accepting the Weird
Some players can't seem to grasp the standard characters in a game -- the classes / races don't fit well with their play style, and they need to try something different. From a character in a vampire LARP who was an embraced animal that used Protean to take human form, to a character who's class was 'I use Rats' and whose class abilities were 'I use Rats'. Characters with no vocal skills, characters whose past was a blank slate, characters who were hidden all the time, so nobody would ever see them, these characters didn't fit into the neat little boxes of the game mechanics - though they fit into the setting just fine. In cases like this, there was some degree of handwavium (and a lot of note taking) to make sure the character was on par with the others as best as could be done.
Paying Attention
When dealing with a player with autism or PTSD, it helps to know ahead of time potential triggers and to respect those triggers. Autistic players can suffer meltdowns from frustration, or can become passive-aggressive, and take these frustrations out on you or the table without meaning to. Or, if they feel like they've been targeted, they can shut down and withdraw, becoming silent through the entire game. As a game master, keeping close attention to the body language of an autistic player is paramount, and if you have a player with PTSD, you need to pay extra attention to potential triggers and be very precise and careful with your wording.
We had a player with PTSD due to sexual assault, who wanted to play in a Kult campaign. They wound up in a situation through their own actions which would have led to an assault scenario. Through careful use of language and being extremely alert to the body language and tone of the player, they got through the scenario just fine -- mostly by ensuring the player was in total control of the scenario and their character, and by being very careful with our wording. Years later, when it came up, they were surprised at what the scenario was, and never felt threatened at all. Job well done.
Work, Work, Work
Running games is extra work when you're dealing with people that have special needs, but again, we feel that tabletop games are for everyone, and we're willing to put the extra work in as needed. It's been very, very rare that we've had to send people from our table, and even more rare because of a mental issue that just didn't mesh with our table. Of course, you need to also make sure your table is okay with the extra work that's involved (because these players will also need to pay attention and be careful with what they say and do as well), but we've often found it rewarding, and helped forge strong bonds of friendship with those who normally feel set aside for being 'problem players'.
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